Runner-up Diem Chau, when confiding in SAOstar, frankly said that she is currently satisfied with her life as a mother of 5 children.
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In 2006, Diem Chau excellently surpassed many contestants to win the title of runner-up at the Miss Vietnam Ao Dai contest. Taking advantage of the victory, two years later she continued to register at Miss Vietnam and ended up in the top 10. In addition to being the runner-up, the beauty also acted in a number of television dramas such as Love since forever. , Reluctant bride, Ugly girl….
When she was young and at the peak of her career, Diem Chau did not hesitate to spend money to buy branded clothes, always present at every game. However, unexpectedly having her first child caused the runner-up to have many positive changes, she left the showbiz world and focused on business. Until now, the beauty has chosen a single life, raising 5 children alone (including two biological nieces). On a November afternoon, SAOstar had the opportunity to listen to Diem Chau’s experiences, thoughts, and feelings about life as a mother of 5 children.
– First of all, SAOstar would like to thank you for accepting the interview to appear in the Mom Talk interview column. With the schedule of a mother of 5 children, she also has to do business. Surely your day is very busy, right?
Many times I wish a day was not 24 hours, but 36 or 72 hours to work enough. sometimes I just turn around and turn around and it’s already dark, before I do anything it’s time to pick up my child, or I just close my eyes to go to sleep and see it’s morning, but I don’t lie awake at all. My child is very interesting, he will wake me up at this time.
– In fact, becoming a single mother is not only Diem Chau, but the way she makes decisions and beliefs makes many people admire her because she “can say it and do it”.
I am not easily influenced, because I think very freely. Because of those people, they don’t live for me, but I live for myself. You have to know how to love yourself, but never put your feelings on other people’s lips or attitudes. Suddenly, after they say something, you will feel sad. People don’t feed us, and talking doesn’t affect sales. So I feel that if you live comfortably and positively, luck will naturally come, but if you live tragically, a lot of sadness and misfortune will come. I feel like that.
– But each person’s choices and outlook on life are influenced and influenced by many different factors, such as childhood and experiences in each person’s environment, which are all very important. What will it be like for you personally?
I find it very true, because when I was young I lived in the love of my parents, my father gave me many special things. My dad said, “Don’t pay attention to those words, because if you don’t believe in yourself, no one can believe in you,” so I always believe in myself. Until now I know that in the past, when my parents ate fish, they said that the fish bones and fish head were delicious, but I had never found it delicious, even the fish meat had bones. But when I raised my child, I realized that the fish bones were delicious, but the meat was not delicious to my parents. I give all my love to my children like my parents give me.
My mother now supports me unconditionally. I once told her, “Mom, I don’t have money, I need 500 million to invest”, but at that time I was actually saving it to give birth. But my mother didn’t ask anything, because she didn’t have any money, but she said, “I have a piece of land, let me pawn it.” When I gave birth to my child, I also felt that I should give him that, I also had to thank him for giving me love, but before I did not know how to love that much. Before, I was often angry with my mother, but now I’m not because I think that when I was a father, my mother would do the same. When I love more and do more good things.
– Often children who grow up in happy families and receive good feelings when they grow up will look for men exactly like their father.
That’s right, until now I still think that maybe one day I will find a husband like my dad, but I don’t know if that person will love my children, I don’t know if they will teach their children the same way my dad taught me. ? My parents never argued about their children. For example, if my mother taught me, my father would stay silent, and then analyze it, as if the two of them were “in tune” with each other. When I grew up, I realized why my parents were so good, like singers and friends, that allowed me to be as successful as I am today.
– Before having her first child, did Diem Chau ever try to find someone whose role model was a husband and father like her father? What made you make such a drastic decision?
No, I just love children. Or I just think about getting married like my dad, but I don’t think seriously about it. Because at that time I loved going out to eat and hanging out with friends, but I wasn’t as worried as I am now. For example, going to a movie costs 100, 200 million, buying two or three handbags and that’s it, there’s nothing to save.
To be serious, at that time I had no plans to have children. To be frank, after the accident, I fell in love without letting the other person know. When I gave birth I was also very scared, because I was playing, I didn’t know if I would be responsible or not? However, before that, I took good care of her. I feel like everything comes from love, but that’s just for her. When I was pregnant, I was very confused. I didn’t have any money and didn’t know if I could teach my children like my father taught me? Then there’s tuition, food, and transportation. I’m also very worried, but when I give birth, my motherly instincts kick in. Gradually, I know what I’m going to do next. Before that, I just prepared grandly in the morning. thinking (laughs).
I was also very worried about informing people that my child might be taken away from me because I was so in love with my child. At that time, I was very conflicted. On the one hand, I was afraid that people would destroy my children and tell me to get married and get married. I felt terrible. What should I do after returning to my husband’s house? I used to wonder if my child didn’t have a father. I carefully thought about it and discussed it with my friends. Everyone advised me to talk about this. I’m just asking, I like to do it my way. In the end, I decided to deal with my mother first. Because she was mentally weak, I kept quiet with her and I was always alone. I had to resolve my own conflicts, on the one hand I was worried about whether I could take care of my child or not, on the other hand I had to deal with my mother.
– Diem Chau is not afraid of being hurt by others, nor is she afraid of the opposite because she understands her own personality. But maybe people will project the concept of happiness onto her, and think that how can she be happy, because she has no one to rely on.
I think each person’s happiness will be different, many people say “I’m too tired from work, I need a husband to take care of me, I’m tired so I have to let my husband do it”. But I’m different. For example, when I go to the hospital, I see someone sitting next to me and I invite them back so I can focus on sleeping. But if someone sits next to me, I can’t sleep. In life, I want to sleep. I’m the one who worries about others, don’t let anyone worry about me, I’m afraid others will worry about me.
– You grew up in a happy family with many siblings, but when you actually gave birth, did you feel no longer lonely? Has your faith and meaning in life become clear?
I often told a sister, “I suddenly thought the opposite after giving birth. Why did I live in the past? I didn’t understand my own purpose in life,” because I was always wearing makeup and going out. , filming, making money and then sleeping, there’s nothing called fun. But thanks to those things, I have the experience to teach my children. Now my goal is my child, I feel it is better than before. If I go out without my children, I don’t go anywhere. In the past, my favorite thing to do was go to Da Lat, take my car everywhere or invite friends to go for coffee.
I also signed up for many classes, so that when my child asks I can explain. Of my 5 children, two of them are very fond of reading, because I told them there is a lot of knowledge in books. Because when my children ask, I always tell them to read books. Nowadays, every child loves books and doesn’t watch TV or cell phones.
– In the process of raising children of different ages, it is inevitable to worry about nutrition, money, and direction for the child. What does Diem Chau think?
For me, it’s extremely difficult. I raised all my children the same, but each of them had a completely different personality. Each child will have a different way of talking and communicating. When I went to the parent teacher meeting, the teachers were all very excited and asked me how I could understand each of them so well. I never forbid my children anything, I just give them knowledge and then the choice is theirs. I let my child make his own decisions, let him take responsibility for himself. Even though my children are still young, I always tell them, “When you believe in yourself, your friends will believe in you.”
– But if your children make mistakes, how will you react to such unexpected situations?
I will ask my child first, and try to train him not to lie. If I let my mistake go, I will lie later to let you forgive me. I will advise my children to tell the truth, each child will explain and not gossip. Gradually, children will learn how to handle everything slowly and patiently without getting confused.
– Has there ever been a time when Diem Chau was touched by her children’s actions?
One time, his older son teased his younger brother and saw him riding a bicycle. He ran out and teased him, causing a bump on his head. But when he got home, the little boy sobbed and didn’t dare tell his mother. The nanny was afraid that his mother would scold his brother. When he saw his mother, the older child ran to him and said, “Mom, it’s my fault, I hit myself with the stick,” while the younger brother begged his mother not to hit his brother, it was the child’s fault. It’s my fault that you two keep fighting for each other. I feel like what I’ve done has paid off and is truly touched. The children give me gifts and flowers every year, but the above is the biggest gift and touches me the most. The two girls now love each other very much, especially the older sister who always cares and pays attention to her younger sister.
– With the responsibility of motherhood, both mentally and physically, it will increase exponentially with the age of the children. Are you stressed about that? For example, sending your child to study abroad, or during your child’s development journey?
If I can’t do it financially, I will sell all my assets so my children can have a better life and learning environment. I can go back to my hometown to build a pond and raise fish as long as you have a good life. Rich here is not about being rich, but about being rich in affection, brothers loving each other. I will try to make my children realize that. Inner strength is extremely important. If your mind is not stable and confident, you cannot do anything. As for me, if my child messes up, I give up and start over. Even though at that time I feel lost and hurt, I will get better results than trying to fix it.
There are many people who tell me that I am a selfish and mean woman, why don’t I think about my children? Because they assume that children must have a father when they are born, and then someday the child will grow up and explain? But until now, why do I say that? I said I went through insemination and had a baby so there was no father. My child still understands that, I give all my love to him, and if he had another father, that would be fine. But if a father is not good, will life be worse? Happiness and joy are felt by each person, not by a certain stereotype. My child thinks that 100% of his love comes from me, if I pour it in, he will be happy. For example, people think that having a father and mother is 100% enough, so when it is not enough, they will feel unhappy.
Before, when I didn’t have children, I was often lazy, but now I do anything, as long as it’s not illegal. If I have a bad day, I’m willing to pick up trash and sell lottery tickets to support my children. I don’t feel embarrassed about that, because my purpose in life is for my children, not for the people around me.
– Thank you Diem Chau for your wonderful sharing, wish you and your mother all the best!